Leilani Kilikina @leilanikilikina

I don’t even know where to begin. So much has happened since I was guided to Liana Shanti. It feels like I’ve lived an entire lifetime in this last year since being divinely guided to her teachings. 

I had been sick for 3+ years with chronic pancreatitis, countless hospital admissions and procedures at leading hospitals across Canada, going in and out of emergency rooms for top ups of pain medications which just made me feel even sicker for days afterwards, many biopsies and pancreatic cancer scares, not being able to eat or drink without pain, or even going for short walks, suffering from debilitating pain with ever increasing medication dosages, getting seen by many of the top GI specialists, - all giving me ONE answer: your pancreatic function is going to worsen, your pain is going to increase, your symptoms are going to worsen over time, you’ll be at a much higher risk of pancreatic cancer and we will eventually need to remove your pancreas, which will make you a type-1 diabetic. Great prognosis, right?

By February of 2021, I was smoking up to 5 grams of weed a day. In addition to this, I was barely eating and was pumping my body full of prescription drugs, including some high level narcotics. I felt like a burden on everyone around me. My husband started working from home by the end of 2019 to become my primary caregiver. I lost who I was. I lost my life. I was looking for ways out. Ways to end my life. I wanted to overdose on my narcotics, but with my history of working in acute care, I was well aware that a medically-induced suicide gone wrong would leave me with anoxic brain injury and even more pain. I was too afraid to jump or hang myself, although in all honesty, those were both very real possibilities I did consider. 

So, instead I started praying. I prayed to God every single day to please not let me wake up the next day. But God had other plans. 

I randomly came across Liana Shanti on Instagram who said in a post, we can heal ourselves from any disease. I was curious, so I messaged her. What did I really have to lose at this point? I was already praying to end my life so I thought, well let’s see what she has to say. I told her what the doctors had told me and if she thought I could do something about it. 

Her response - you can heal yourself from chronic pancreatitis. Nothing is permanent - not the damage to your pancreatic tissue and neither is the pain. She was the FIRST person to ever say that to me, so I was both in tears at that possibility and intrigued. Liana took time out of her day to have a conversation with me, an absolutely complete stranger, and offered me hope, spoke to me with love and patience and kindness. I thanked her and she sent me love and healing prayers. She didn’t try to sell me anything. 

I began going through her profile, who she was, what she offered. She spoke of real healing, deep healing, core healing. Not the surface stuff but she spoke TRUTH about childhood trauma and wounding, and brought awareness to things most people would be too afraid to speak of. But not her! She was fierce and honest! I wondered if she could really help me. Every cell in my body screamed YES! SHE IS THE REAL DEAL!

In March of 2021, I signed up for her community. I began listening to her teachings, and EVERY SINGLE THING she said were things I was too afraid to face my own self. She spoke and taught of UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. That’s when I realized the lie that my life was and had always been! My whole life, I had been living under the false illusion that my parents loved me, unconditionally. But instead I realized, I was only loved when my likes, desires and behaviors met their agenda. Unconditional love didn’t exist my entire life and in most circumstances was replaced by physical, mental and emotional abuse when I wanted to follow my own wishes and suggested them:

• Cutting my hair

• How I wanted to dress

• What career I wanted to pursue

• Choosing my life partner

• What food I ate

• …this list is inexhaustible

The more trauma I uncovered, the more I healed from my physical pain. Pain I had been in non-stop for 3+ years. THIS was my first experience of LIFEPROOF. Going from not knowing what it feels like to not be in excruciating pain at ever moment of every day, to no pain. I was mind blown to say the least. This was real and happening to me. It was the opposite of what every doctor had told me because they were just looking at the physical symptoms without addressing anything else. Being pain-free was no longer just a message I was reading from her. It was turning into my reality. 

Next, my physical strength returned. I began showering with no one watching over me. I began to cook in the kitchen again with my husband. I began to go on walks with our furbaby. Things I hadn't been able to do the last 3 years. 

Then the mental and emotional lifeproof showed up - I began to respect myself again (not more, I mean AGAIN because it had completely stopped). I started to look at myself in the mirror again and not see a sick body looking back at me. I began to smile at myself again. My husband and me began rebuilding our relationship again, which had once been lost because I had become a hollow shell of who I once used to be on all my medications. But this time, our relationship was better, more loving, more respectful, more kind.

The more trauma I uncovered through Liana’s life changing programs, the more alive I felt. My will to live returned. Now I wanted to live! I remember I told my husband one day after working with Liana for a few months, “I don’t want to die yet”, as we both sat their crying. THIS WAS MY TURNING POINT. Liana’s guidance and teaching connected me with Jesus. Not the religious BS one, but the REAL JESUS - the path of unconditional love. Which is exactly what my teacher embodies in everything she does - UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. 

The more I healed my trauma and wounding, the more my mind, my body and my soul improved. I began to have dreams again of what I wanted to do in my life. Our dream was to move someplace warm, have a tinyhome on a big plot of land and work for ourselves. We cut out all the toxic crap from our life - abusive family and friends, soul-sucking jobs, and left the cold ass winters of Canada. My intense addictions to weed and alcohol just so I could survive my interactions with toxic friends and family because that way, I was there physically, but I wasn't really there because I really didn't want to be.

And come October, guess what? WE DID JUST THAT! We moved to the sunshine state, in our tinyhome on a big plot of land, LIVING OUR DREAM! 

I wanted to help others suffering from chronic pancreatitis who had also been given their futile diagnosis, and joined Health Mastery Institute to become a Certified Holistic Health Coach. As I pursued that, even more dreams started coming true. I began giving others the same hope that I had once received from Liana. Real hope, because I was LIFEPROOF of it!

I always loved art and I always wanted to make that a part of my career. My parents told me I could never have a career in art so I went to school for health care. And guess what? I DID THAT TOO THIS YEAR! I am painting, creating stickers and helping soulful entrepreneurs build brands for their businesses!!! Like WHO KNEW this would be something I would be doing. But here I AM, doing just that. Why?? Because my teacher, Liana Shanti, BELIEVED IN ME. Believed in my gifts. That was my parents job, but they failed to do that. But they also failed to love me unconditionally. 

Everything my friends and family thought I was incapable and crazy for doing, I did!

I wanted to have my health, my life back - DONE

I wanted to live in a warm place - DONE

I wanted to have a little teddy bear come to life (my furbaby) - DONE

I wanted to live in a tiny home - DONE

I wanted to work for myself, doing what I love - DONE

I wanted to marry the love of my life while every family member fought to tear us apart because we came from 2 feuding religious backgrounds - DONE

I wanted to love myself again - DONE

WHY? Because of UNCONDITIONAL LOVE - something I learned from my teacher Liana Shanti and who embodies the unconditional love and teachings of Jesus. She infuses  everything she does with unconditional love - her words, her messages, her teachings, her guidance - and most of all, her love!

How many people can say they have done ALL of this? THIS is why I say it feels like I have lived a lifetime in this past one year. And I am just getting started!!! DO YOU IN THE BACK HEAR ME???

Liana is the ONLY teacher who walks her talk. Who embodies and lives and breathes what she teaches, in every part of her life - teacher, mother, friend, wife! My cup has been overflowing with love and gratitude for her since the first day I messaged her as a random stranger, and that cup has NEVER stopped overflowing. It is spilling over for others to get a taste of what a life with Liana's teachings look and feel like!

THANK YOU LIANA FOR SAVING MY LIFE, AND GUIDING ME BACK HOME TO JESUS!!